tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7474005001391922061.post6755454147874827020..comments2022-11-07T03:07:51.237-06:00Comments on Creating the Relationship of Your Dreams: Quality Relationships Welcome ChangeUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7474005001391922061.post-92001444968137008552009-02-07T08:33:00.000-06:002009-02-07T08:33:00.000-06:00Thank you Anonymous! Your comments brings into th...Thank you Anonymous! Your comments brings into the light one of those challenges that faces every committed relationship. In a recent discussion regarding ‘equal opportunities and discrimination’ it was stated that some discrimination is based on one’s circumstance such as race and gender, but everyone gets older! The aging process brings many challenges to relationships. I am especially appreciative of your comments. My remarks as a male regarding the challenge of menopause and related issues are little more than an opinion. Most men, I believe, don’t have a clue of what it must be like to deal with the changes a woman experiences throughout her life as the one whose body experiences the bio-physical hormonal changes throughout her adult life.<BR/><BR/>Talking about what is going on with your spouse is powerful. It seems that men can adjust their views and expectation if they have understanding – and understanding can lead to a higher level of acceptance and love. The pressures and changes of life define our character. Anyone can seem loving and accepting when everything is just right! These challenges present the opportunity to fix things about ourselves that need fixing. Your statement about a ‘deepened love and respect’ is a great! Men, I believe, experience being loved when they are respected. Respect is honoring the efforts and intent of a man’s expressions of love. RussRuss Hardestyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08551172551455521451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7474005001391922061.post-48028828278469491942009-02-04T20:44:00.000-06:002009-02-04T20:44:00.000-06:00A change that has been an opportunity for personal...A change that has been an opportunity for personal and relational maturity? For the last four years my husband has put up with the changes I've been going through as a result of menopause. This has been one of the most major changes in my life except for perhaps having children. However, children are a joy whereas menopause can be anything but that. Not every woman goes through these major jolting changes as I did but I am hearing more and more that it is an untalked about problem in marriages and one of the reasons many couples in their 40s-50s go their separate ways. All of the difficulties we as women deal with regarding menopause definitely affect our relationship with our spouse. Of course the main one is a change in the woman's desire for sexual intimacy. As Suzanne Somers said on Oprah last week. "All the parts were there and still working but I felt like, Sex? No,I'd rather have a smoothie." Associated with this, at least for me, has been lack of motivation, apathy, irritability and lack of energy. My spouse has been one of the most supportive individuals through all that this has thrown me. I've gone through many doctors trying to find a "cure". Most have told me, "This just happens to women as they get older. If hormones don't work then you'll just have to live with it." All along the way I talked with my husband about my problems assuring him that my lack of interest in sexual intimacy was part of the physical changes going on in me and no reflection on him. But as the months turned into years I'm sure he was beginning to wonder. But he still stuck with me and was patient.<BR/><BR/>Put just like Suzanne Somers said, I was not willing to just live with this problem especially my total lack of libido. Someone told me about an OB/GYN doctor in town who prescribes bioidentical hormones and a compounding pharmacy that makes the formula specifically to your need. I went and he prescribed a match for me. It took a little over a month but we are back to better than we were before.<BR/><BR/>But my point is, physical illness and change as we get older can be opportunities to see our spouse shine in the areas of flexibility, quality and care. Although I would not wish what I went through with menopause on anyone, I can say it has deepened my love and respect for my husband who is patient, kind and loving as ever. <BR/><BR/>Many times we really don't know how our spouse or how we will hold up under pressures of such things as physical illness and inevitable changes with age. Although there is no real sure-fire way to know how your spouse will react, I know at least one way is to communicate what is going on with you as changes begin to happen. Illicit their support and understanding. Talk about it. It can help.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com